[ Fic ] Never Forgive , Never Forget

[lemomina]

 Title: Never Forgive , Never Forget
Characters: Elle , Sylar , Little Noah , mention of Sylar / Elle
Rating: PG-13
Summary: For being just a little boy, Noah was her hero, her savior from a life of bitterness and hatred
Disclaimer: Heroes belongs to Kring , NBC and Whoever ...
Spoilers/Warnings:  Spoiler for Vol.3  , AU  and a bit dark
Notes: Thanks to my Awesome Friend do_you_like_pie  for being so awesome and encouraging me all the way  ( Love ya <33 ) also  Thanks to my great friend dela26  for BETA-ing this for me  ( here is you basket of cookies )

 

It has been a month now, since the day he invaded their life. Ever since Sylar found out that he had a son, he started acting all good and polite... almost like how Elle remembers what he was like as Gabriel. Elle found the change in his demeanor both disturbing and annoying. She hadn't forgiven him yet for what he had done to her. The bastard killed her and set her body on fire. Scarred her for life, both literally and metaphorically. Sylar took everything from her, including her daddy, her dreams, her life as well as her Gabriel.  And in Elle's eyes, no matter how hard he tried; she wasn't going to forgive him. Ever. 

He visits more regularly now, practically coming everyday.  Her hate grows stronger with every play date. Elle feels that he is stealing her son away from her.  Every moment that her son is with Sylar, Elle is in pain and agony.  Little Noah is the only thing that is good in her life. Noah loves her unconditionally. He loves her even though she wasn't always the best mother. But for a person like her, being "good" was a great achievement. Elle strongly believes that Sylar doesn't deserve this life, deserve to have such a wonderful son. He didn't deserve to be loved unconditionally or to have a family that he literally killed once upon a time. He was a liar, a murder, and psychopathic serial killer.  Who is he to think that he can walk into their lives? He should have to work his ass off to earn their son's love, pay for his mistakes, and redeem himself. Like she did. When she was given another chance in life, she became a better person and her scars were a punishment for what she had done long time ago and a reminder of how far she had come. But Sylar had multiple "chances" after acquiring the Cheerleader's ability.  He had died more than once and came back again the same as he was, maybe even worse.  Sylar claims to be trying to become a better person, but Elle knows that he didn't pay for his sins, didn't even think about redeeming himself before ever knowing about their son.

 

Whenever Noah is deep in his sleep, they fight. They argue usually about the same things. He thinks that she needs to forgive and forget.  Elle can't get over it.  It's not that simple.  How can she move on, since she's been traumatized by their entire history?  She still has flashbacks and nightmares about that night on the beach. The betrayal. Elle wakes up covered in cold sweat, anxiety soars as she realizes he's back in her life.  Now that he's around, she has begun to have nightmares about the day her son's ability will manifest and what will happen after that.  She doesn't feel safe, for either herself or for her son, and she wants Sylar the hell out of their lives.  Sylar thinks she's overreacting, part of her ingrained "personality" issues and trust problems. He pleads that he's changed and that it's all in the past now.  Elle doesn't need to be a mind reader to know that he is a liar.

Her son is everything to her.  They have a special bond that only a mother and son can share.  Sometimes Elle considers that maybe she is too attached to him, maybe more than normal and healthy, but she was Elle Bishop and there was nothing normal about her. Elle strives to guarantee that she will never end up like her father, all cold and detached and disapproving. Such an approach really took a number on her development and emotional well-being. Elle made a vow that would raise Noah better. So what if she spoiled him a little?! Gave him whatever he wants and whatever he asks for. Elle would do anything to keep him happy and smiling. 

 For being just a little boy, Noah was her hero, her savior from a life of bitterness and hatred. If it wasn't for him, she would have continued traveling down a dark path filled with anger, revenge and killing.

 Elle sometimes would sneak into his room and sleep with Noah in his small bed whenever she had a nightmare. For some reason, she always slept better when he was beside her as she felt safer just knowing that he was inches away from her sleeping peacefully. She always felt like it was part of Noah's unique charm, the ability to make her feel better, safer.  He calms her usual frenzied, electric state to be much more peaceful and soothing.

 As usual, Elle and Sylar are up late fighting. This argument centered on Sylar wanting to take Noah for the weekend. Elle was not going to let that happen. Ever.

 Unlike most nights, little Noah woke up. 

 "Mommy?" Noah rubs his eyes, his voice muffled with sleep, "What's wrong?" 

 "Nothing Buddy." Sylar jumps in before Elle can open her mouth. "Do you want to come with Daddy this weekend?"

 Noah's face lights up.  His little head bobs in fast agreement. Elle feels immediately torn, she never wants to take away his smiles.

 "Well, Mommy doesn't want you to come." Sylar continues.

 Elle was beyond furious now; he was using their son to get what he wants.

 Noah looks up with confused puppy dog eyes. "Mommy, why don't you say yes?”

 Sylar's eyes go dark, a smile spreading across his face.  Elle feels the urge to slug him, but instead decides to do something worse.  She knows what she is about to do is wrong.  She knows it will break little Noah's heart. But she had to do it; it is the only way to keep her and Noah safe in the long run.

 “Because your father is a bad man, he had hurt many people and he had hurt Mommy, gave her those ugly scares and Mommy is afraid that he would hurt you too” Elle said it as coldly as she could, she had to block all her emotions and look in her killers’ eyes while she did it

 Noah's face crumbles.  It makes her heart hurt knowing that she pained her only love.

 Sylar looks like she had slapped him.  His mouth is hanging open in surprise, he never saw this coming. He never imagined that she would tell their son that, the Ugly truth.

 Sylar’s face turns red as Noah pushes away from him and runs between Elle's legs .Sylar was hurt, confused and angry as he saw Noah running away from him like he was a monster that would eat him whenever he gets a chance. The little boy held so tight onto his mother's legs like his life depends on it.

 “Its okay baby, he is going to leave now I will make sure of it, now why don’t you go wait for me in your room?” Elle tells her son as she kisses the top of his head and scoots him towards the bedroom door.  Noah bolts like lightening. 

 Elle can see the anger and sadness practically rising from Sylar's body.  He looked broken; he cared a lot about their son .She almost felt sorry for Sylar, almost.  "

 "Why, Elle? How can you do this to me? You've destroyed everything!" He snaps

 “I told him the truth He deserves to know it. Weren't you always the one obsessed with telling the truth?! Or now that it's against you, you don't want to hear it, is that it? “Elle replies coldly.  Sylar holds his hands over his face, as if to block her words.  The truth really stings like a bitch.

 A t hearing Sylar's angry voice, Noah fearfully cries for his mother

 “Would you just leave, he clearly doesn't want you here, so you are not welcomed anymore “she said acting as polite as she can, she knew her son could hear her in the next room. It was enough that Noah is scared of one his father and he definitely doesn’t need to be scared of her too .And with that Sylar left with a defeated look on his face and a broken heart.
After that night, Sylar never tried to contact them again, but Elle was pretty sure that he was still watching over them.